Work & Play

Celebrity Winners of the Best Facial Hair Awards

By Nick Burns

While the celebrities strut their stuff on various red carpets this month, we thought we’d hand out a few awards of our own. Welcome to the very first Best Facial Hair Awards. The envelope, please!

 

 

 

The Mountain Man Beard Award: Jake Gyllenhaal

Jake Gyllenhaal’s mountain man beard might be long and bushy, but he keeps it combed, expertly trimmed and healthy-looking. When dealing with facial hair at this length, maintenance is key to avoiding an overgrown and unkempt nest full of woodland creatures.
 

Best Eyebrows on an Agent Award: Saif Ali Khan

There’s nothing worse than a man with barely-there eyebrows. But most Bollywood stars suffer from the opposite problem – overly large or bushy eyebrows. Saif Ali Khan's Agent Vinod looks right - an Indian James Bond, impeccably dressed and styled.

 

Best Moustache on a Villain Award: Anil Kapoor

You might not understand what the heck Anil Kapoor was doing in Mission Impossible, but his moustache is perfectly clear. Kapoor’s ’stache strikes a delicate stance on his fast-talking communications billionaire mouth, but doesn't help his case. . If you have large features, dainty facial hair will only serve to make things look larger.
 

Best Funny Man Mustache Award: Eddie Murphy

While Tower Heist won’t win the Oscar for Best Picture, Murphy’s finely trimmed chevron mustache deserves an award for the way its angular shape balances out his oval face.
 

Best Hair Ball Award: Questlove

If you’re going to sport a voluminous afro, follow Questlove’s (of The Roots) lead and grow a full beard to help balance out the look and avoid looking like you’re wearing a hair helmet. His beard emphasizes his strong jawline, anchoring his incredible hairstyle and bringing the entire look together.
 

Best Eyebrows on a Solo Artist Award: Drake

There’s nothing worse than a man with over-plucked, barely-there eyebrows. Drake’s thick but tidy brows properly frame his eyes, without looking overdone or overgrown. Gentlemen, don’t forget: There should be two.
 

Best Mustache on a Muppet Award: Swedish Chef

You might not understand what the Swedish Chef has to say, but his mustache is perfectly clear. The Chef’s ’stache strikes a delicate balance between his bulbous nose, gaping mouth and wild eyebrows. If you have large features, dainty facial hair will only serve to make things look larger.
 

Best Breakup Beard: Russell Brand

Breaking up is hard to do, but funnyman Russell Brand does it in style. His recent split from pop star Katy Perry has left him with a dastardly, pirate-worthy beard that gives him a brooding look -- an appropriate style for a recent divorcé, if you ask us.
 

Best Performance by a Goatee and Mustache Duo: Kanye West

Kanye West keeps his mustache short, expertly trimmed and narrow to avoid adding weight between his nose and lip. Instead, he turns the focus to his goatee, which emphasizes his strong chin and jawline.
 

Best Rock ’n’ Roll Beard Award: Lenny Kravitz

When you’re a rock ’n’ roll icon, you can pull off any look, but Kravitz keeps his beard short, trimmed and only slightly wild. The beard slims down his round face and balances out the roundness of his hairstyle, while highlighting his mouth and lips (not a bad thing when you’re a singing front man).
 

Best Smooth(ish) Stubble Award: John Legend

When you’re a smooth soul singer, you need facial hair that will complement your gentlemanly style while upping your game. John Legend’s perfect short stubble adds a dash of roughness to his boyish face -- but not enough to scare off the ladies.
 
And our awards for most dubious facial hair styles go to …
 

The Trying-Too-Hard Award: Shah Rukh Khan

Don 2 starrer Shah Rukh plays a badass, going from long locks to short hair, all in the space of one movie. - perfecting the art of the unkempt hair and long beard— and that’s the problem. It’s all a little ridiculous. Even prisoners are pretty sure to have access to a razor. And being Don, he's sure to get what he wants. Maybe Bollywood could take a lesson from Hollywood and groom their stars when needed.

 

Most Awkward-Looking Stubble Award: Ranbir Kapoor

When teenage girls proclaim their undying (undead?) love for a Rockstar, you can rest assured he's going to have long hair and a stubble. Unfortunately, this stock look does make Kapoor look like he's an unemployed janitor, instead of a college student and stud. Maybe he needs a lesson from Lenny Kravitz.

All Images: Getty Images




Nick Burns is one of the leading grooming writers in the country. He has contributed to numerous publications, including GQ, Esquire, Details and The New York Times, and is co-author of The Bearded Gentleman: The Style Guide to Shaving Face. This is his first article for Men's Life Today.

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